SHE.HER.

Friday, April 29, 2005

decided to post a blog before my vcding.. hehe.. hmm wow so fast one mth (exact) le...haha i still remb i was so blur tat i din realise it happened.. ha.. thanks for reminding ah.. *bleah* hmm dunno how long we can go but evert day happy can le rite?
this one mth.. thou short but had lots of emotions in it.. it has been happy, sad, helpless, but nw.. i'm still happy till this veri day.. n thanks dear..
k loh.. enough of mushy mushy..

~signing off loh~

Thursday, April 28, 2005

我到了这个时候还是一样
夜里的寂寞容易叫人悲伤
我不敢想的太多因为我一个人
迎面而来的月光拉长身影

漫无目的地走在冷冷的街我没有你的消息
因为我在想你
爱我别走如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔
爱我别走如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

我到了这个时候还是一样
夜里的寂寞容易叫人悲伤
我不敢想的太多因为我一个人
迎面而来的月光拉长身影
漫无目的地走在冷冷的街我没有你的消息
因为我在想你
爱我别走如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔
爱我别走如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口

再给我一点温柔
爱我别走如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔
爱我别走如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

a very old school song, kind of sad but suits nw..

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

finally i can blog le.. past few days i've been so occupied n tired.. finished settling grandma side.. nw i'm burning.. hahah.. last sun i juz go sentosa with Wenyan and May Chan.. and nw guess wad.. i got sunburn. so painful.. haiyo.. hmm so tired nw.. go rest liao.. hehe.. only manage to blog a short one..

take care..
~signin off~

Friday, April 22, 2005

Until the end of time
Pearpi

Not long ago
I dreamt of a fairy tale
It started one night
Sweetness filled everyday

Wondering day by day
What wrong came in between
Was totally lost
Until i realised it is a dream

You told me my fairy tales are fake
I was too innocent
I simply wasn't your princess
But i will never let you go
Even being a star watching upon you
would easily content me

I guess u won't know
Ever since you picked me up by the roadside
My matchstick lid up
Even a glow of warmth i could feel

I can't live without that glow
but if i have to
it will be end of time
the day i went away

never be replaced
you taught me
no doubt you make me happy
no doubt you make me living once again

As long as you want
I'll be with you
No doubt if I have to let you go
it will be end of the time

Treasure everything,
every moments we have together
Perfectly sorry for being so addicted to you

How long will i be waiting
No matter how long it takes
I still can't make you mine

but i'm truely happy till this day

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

had a busy week.. and its onli tues today..
hmm cuz later got to go grandma's funeral tat y.. nw at hm.. cuz at 7 gotta be there le.. hmm grandma past away on sunday mornin.. but she goes peacefully and she's 81.. veri strong woman.. feel quite sad.. but tat's past and parcel of life.. hmm to think nw i left none grandparents.. all up in the heaven.. but kind if miss dem.. so out there u better apreciate ur grandparents orh.. cuz having time chattin wif them is so precious.. i always loved my grandma talking abt her younger days during the jap occupation in spore.. but everythin she told me will be kept forever in my memories..
k lah enough of tat.. these few days quite tiring cuz after work got to rush to the funeral rituals.. but i try not to complain of my tiredness cuz.. ehh.. dunno how to put into words.. juz feel not in the position to complain.. kind of guilty.. nvm..
precious everyone.. muz appreciate everyday u have o..

*dear pls take care.. hope the doc really do somethin abt it..

~signin off~
appreciating everyday i hav..

Sunday, April 17, 2005

Backstreet Boys
All I Have To Give

I don't know
What he does to make you cry
But I'll be there to make you smile
I don't have a fancy car
To get to you I'd walk a thousand miles

I don't care If he buys you nice things
Does his gifts come from the heart? I don't know
But if you were my girl
I'd make it so we'd never be apart

Chorus :But my love is all I have to give
Without you I don't think I can live
I wish I could give the world to you
But love is all I have... To give

When you talk
Does it seem like he's not
Even listening to a word you say?
That's okay babe
Just tell me your problems
I'll try my best to kiss them all away
Does he leave when you need him the most?
Does his friends get all your time?
Baby please... I'm on my knees
Praying for the day that you'll be mine!

[Chorus]
Bridge :To you... Hey girl, I don't want you to cry no more inside
All the money in the world could not add up to all the love
I have inside... I love you
And I will give it to you
All I can give, all I can give
Everything I have is for you
But love is all I have to give
But my love is all I have to give
Without you I don't think I can live
I wish I could give the world to you
But love is all I have to give... To you

hmm.. someone once told me abt this song and say meant things said in this song.. really thinks so hard.. i start to feel things faded and not noeing wad cld i do.. do u really meant tat.. but it seems all fade.. maybe i shldn't get myself in it so much.. maybe u give yet i din see.. there's so long a list of maybe.. but no use listing out.. all are juz assuming.. why no matter who no matter when.. there is always a difference before n after.. i noe love cant be compared.. but the feeling deep inside will tell alot of things.. things u dun wanna noe.. things u nvr noe.. and things made ur whole so splendid.. like i always say " you never know"
shld i let go.. if freedom is all you need.. but i'll always be waiting.. guess you nvr got to see this.. but juz in case u did..
i wld like to say to you.. everything seems so pressure to you.. knowing u oready cracking up.. i'll still be wif you.. but tell ya.. i got no confident how long can i hold on.. but when my limit is up.. i'll be resting.. taking a break.. i still need assurance at times.. but i learnt not to need tat cuz u may be too cracked up wif things oready but if u cant show me wad u said before.. den let me noe.. cuz i dun feel gd nw..

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

hmm recently too much happened.. but guess wad everything will be over.. and nw me in a clear mind.. had a different view in life.. i noe at times i will be outta control as i got my head stuck too deep.. nw my head is back on my neck.. gers sorry i hav made u guys worry abt me.. n there bound to be upset or sadness in u guys.. n no matter wad wanted badly u to noe.. i'm simply a nothin without u 2.. seen both u 2's blog.. i knew these will came to u 2.. but at tat moment i really found it so hard to hold on.. but i really noe all things u guys tot are all best for me.. n i really appreciate cuz no matter wad we had been thru so much.. and we are friends tat still will go thru alot of obstacles ahead.. so the onli things we can keep on goin is holding on wif each othr.. and i used to think times will nvr change n tot things will always be the same.. i believe this came to u when we in sch days.. but when we leave sch we still hold believe of nvr change.. but when we leave sch days.. gaps came cause we're on different track.. so if anyone got something that need to be said.. say it now cuz we're moving on and can't slow down.. these sch memories are playing like a film w/o sound.. taken frm the Graduation song.. and this particular sentence left a deep impact in me.. " As we go on, we remember all the times we had together. And as our lives change come wadever, we will still be friends forever..."
hmm no matter at anytime anyone would doubt this sentence but i knew tat the last thing i wanna keep in my memories before i died would be this precious memories.. cuz in this world everything onli happened once therefore only memories can keep tat moment forever..

and yan once u told me to not stuck deep and thanks for tat.. cuz it did make me see things i din realise.. for once i had my head stuck so deep in the hole.. thou i cant really control .. i may been too focus on wad's inside that hole n neglect the fresh air outside.. nw i have learnt to take a breathe..

bao nothing more needed to say.. as its all in my heart.. i noe u feel it whenever u need..

i had a life to go on.. and maintaining is the hardest n skill-needed thing in the world for me.. thou at times i feel holding on hurts badly but against all bruises i'll try and hold on.. and u guys will too..

~signing off~

As Long As You're Loving Me
Vitamin C

I believe in you
This is real for me
What I feel for you
Didn't Come so naturally
At first I was afraid
Couldn't fight the fight
Couldn't keep the light on
With any other lights, oh love, oh love

Now I'm ready for the world
No matter what it brings
I can feel all my dreams coming true
As long as you're loving me
As long as you're loving me
I can move mountains
I can part seas
My heart will be open for eternity
As long as you're loving me

Yeah, yeah
This is what feels good
This is what feels right
The moment I wake up
Until we say goodnight
And I'm stronger than I was
I've reached down and I've touched
It's easier to lie down with you on my side
On the side
Now I'm ready for the world no matter how it spins
Cause I'll always be in it with you

As long as you're loving me
As long as you're loving me
(as long as you're loving me)
I can move mountainsI can part seas
My heart will be open for eternity
As long as you're loving me
Ohh, as long as you're loving me

Now I'm ready for the world
No matter what it brings
I can feel all my dreams coming true
As long as you're loving me
As long as you're loving me
I can move mountains
I can part seas
My heart will be open for eternity
As long as you're loving me

I know where I'm going
Where I belong
I'll be forever saving your love
As long as you're loving me,
As long as you're loving me
As long as you're loving me, yeah
As long as you're loving me

Saturday, April 09, 2005

hahaha.. heard fel say my posts recently so sad.. so decided to post one todae..
hehe todae i'm veri happy.. juz had a long chat wif yanz.. hahah. oh o.. yan i teachin u bad stuffs ah.. keke.. hmm tml still dunno wad's the plan.. but gotta go his hse first loh.. den plan wad to do.. but i taking dvd to go watch wif fel.. hahaha.. k lah.. let my happy mood last till work starts and oh yah.. sun got to go collegue's daughter full month.. hmmm so enthu to see her daughter.. keke.. and oso yippie got sushi to eat loh... muahahhaha..

~signing off happily~

Thursday, April 07, 2005

hmm feeling sort of lost.. nobody noe wad to do..
do you feel me like i feel you
was it wasted words and did they mean a thing
and all our precious time but i still feel so in between
is it startin like wad it shld be in the first place
dun meant to be in

some day i'll juz keep pretending
tat you'll say dreaming of a different ending
i wanna hold on but it hurts so bad
and i can't keep something that i never had

i keep telling myself things can turn ard with time
and if i wait it out you cld oways change your mind
like a fairy tale where it works out in the end
then i realize its just wad might have been

hmm hear this frm a song.. sounds kinda rite nw..

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

when will a hero comes along.. to cast tat fear aside.. y its so hard.. its always so hard to compromise.. suddenly juz felt hope is gone.. tat simply nothin i can do.. there are so many questions in me..
how to make everythin juz fine.. thou not perfect but fine.. how can i let u noe that it isn't how u tot.. how can i remain things i hav and not lost when new things added.. y life is full of choices.. i simply hate to make choices, hate doing decisions.. dunno wad limit will it meet.. till out of control.. knowing not possible to make everythin fine.. juz making me feel so sad..
whenever hoping my effort makes some comfort but end up.. ruining everything.. knowing things happened n is out of my reach to help.. tat's making me so useless.. being so near yet so far.. and nw distant is the word.. maybe u got me wrong.. i dun wan changes.. i juz need rearrange my portion.. i give up my portion if possible.. but yet a pop-up can to me tat hw long can i do this.. n the onli ans i hav is as long as possible.. i love my peeps.. i love ppl who being wif me everyday and by my side.. the love can never be erased n never be replace.. until i lose myself...

~nvr can get out of this. it grows in me~

Monday, April 04, 2005

todae.. finally got to sch and see my kids.. so happy to see them.. haha n they so sweet say miss me wor.. hmm wonder my spiderman got miss me anot.. keke.. *bleah*
on yah todae spiderman on leave.. got to go repair his web. hehe.. but as i got to work can acc him go.. so sad.. *waaaaaaa* hehe.. act onli.. hahah.. hmmm but lucky his not warded.. thnk god.. hmm but miss my spiderman so much.. din see him todae.. but nvm ltr got to tok to him loh.. hahahah.. *heavens neh*
todae during lunch break my crazy fun collegues we celebrate for the april babies.. hehe.. hahah.. shy aunties dun wannna take photos somemore.. hehe..
hmm first time got my partner wif me till 6.. feel so blessed.. keke...
hmm heheh and oso received calls frm spiderman o.. keke..
hmm really hope wed i can be free.. n acc my jie mei for half a day..
hope she will feel better.. after some shopping..

~signing off~
bless everyone..

Sunday, April 03, 2005

juz finished bathin.. and here i'm bloggin.. hmm guess yan they all are now clubbing.. oh yah happy bdae to tet tet o... hehe an advance one.. hmm yesterday supposely i'm on mc shld be stayin at hm but guess wad.. i decided to me bao yan an n bert at tamp inter.. keke.. den after jalan jalan from tm to cs.. hahah first time we got nothin to do den we headed for yan hse.. n heheh we watchin vcds.. the veri old sch.. Gen-X-Cops.. oh by my lover Stephen Fung.. muahahaah,,, but i onli watch till half way.. den go meet dwight fel n keong.. go jalan jalan n again at tm.. ahhaha,, si bo liao rite.. haiz n i still sick cant eat long john wif them... sob sob... hahah all becuz kanna been stare at.. ahhaha.. ok i din meant anythin... he'll go sayin u cough stilll drink cold drinks.. hahaha..
den bought my cds at challenger.. woaf.. so exp sia.. but nvm can split wif daddy.. hahah smart ger rite.. i noe.. hmm den we 2 headed his hm first.. heehe althou i got not much appetite but auntie's lemak nice wor..
den the dili dali.. i got to go hm.. sobbie..
todae.. met him n his mum.. cuz he nid go check up todae... den we headed to east point ther n had our... eh lunch or dinner.. hmm.. one of it lah.. actually tot today he might be warded but.. as oways said.. u think i tot who cfm... wahahahhaha.. fast learner rite.. thank you.. keke
den after tat we went his home again,,, haha.. keong slping n fel "doin hmwork" hahahha.. n guess wad we watching the crappiest show.. the miss spore universe... wahahahha.. lol.. but i think onli the winner can make it.. hehehe,, opps...

k lah.. dunno tml do wad oso...

~signing off loh~ got to talk to spiderman le... hahaha