UnpRedictable mystery of mine

Brand New Astart

2008-01-13T22:17:00.000+08:00

New start.. Past over.. Newborn arrives...

Chances..

2008-01-02T22:38:00.000+08:00

Chances

Chance is been give once and twice. forgive and forget i tell.. but again nothing was done. i gave up telling.

Xmas

2007-12-25T16:55:00.000+08:00

Christmas 2007

One fine morning on Christmas Day with a horrible yesterday. Yes to think I'm out for countdown. Haa laugh at myself, how pathetic I am, BUT I don't need your pity. So what with all those i dear so much. Big joke of spending this unforgettable Christmas eve alone at home. Great isn't it, i bet you don't have the chance of experiencing it. Come to think, this is the first and definately the last. I wont do this to myself again. So much for New Year eve to come. I'm preparing already. No more hoping on others but to spend it well. This I promise. Well not spoiling My Christmas, I got lots of things to plan.. And spent a nite tidying up my room found all my memorable stuffs. A great nite I have reflected on myself. In thoughts, I've grown so much. And realises so much, I was blinded before. No more on whining. Its enough.

Done. So much on reflecting. Now in the near future I will strive even harder. I will be better. I will earn my Liscense and faster than you can catch up. 2008 here i come.

Utterly Disappointed

2007-12-25T01:02:00.000+08:00

Utterly Disappointed

Indeed, once again. I get it. so yup that's it. I'm in only for sorrows never for happiness huh. Don't blame me for drastic changes. so this is wad so called best to you. Great enjoy your retribution. I'm all hands off yours. You'll never understand.

Right down at the end

2007-12-17T23:07:00.000+08:00

Its always easier said, but never easily done. The life boat don't seems to help, the float don't seems to help either. All those firecrackers i sent wont of any use. Its too late. I'm dead. no beat. no sound. Cant revive.

Revive.

2007-12-12T21:01:00.000+08:00

Today I felt like blogging so here i am.. its been months since i last did. Today is a remarkable one. My first time of playing with "snow", brought my students to snow city. pretty cold inside but yeap i wore 4 layers to keep myself warm.. n looking at the children in the jackets they walked like penguins. so cute. and due to the coldness, their cheeks and noses are turnin red. today's trip was quite smooth except the macdonald part. The manager (obviously not doing his job and obviously no brain) expect 50 over children and adults to sit each table 5-6 ppl. seriously no brain. imagine mac's table is so small already n the chair is so bulky. and during this rainy season still arrange us to sit at the outdoor area lucky its not pouring cats and dogs if not. ARGH no brains n its the 3rd time i'm sayin it.. haa one of the parents even feed back to the manager, "you called this service? burger king do a better job." Haa in my heart i was like INTERESTING.
After the lunch, we headed back to school. As usual, most children are dozing off in the bus while i'm busy keepin my children entertained with songs. So we had an express bathing session and fast action putting children to sleep. talking about sleepin i'm turning soon.. so tired after a day.

*yawnzzzzzzzzz shall blog again when I have time...

If my hero never come, I'll..

2007-08-02T22:59:00.000+08:00

Till the day i have to go.. If my hero never comes, I'll keep hold of the memories. they are the best things in my life. The effort i realise now is too late, kisses and hugs became so precious but it still feels like yesterday. I've never came to knew that they became the best thing in life. no one is ever so caring for me, so thoughtful for me, so afraid i'll be too fragile, and putting so much effort in me. the bench, the path, the bus, the sky, the night, the movies, the clubs, the conversations, the shoulder, the pillar and the past.What else can love do?

I promise you. I'll never hide if there is a next time.

Today

2007-04-16T21:38:00.000+08:00

You don't know how its like to be me today.

You wouldn't want to know how i lead my life

You never could feel that slash in my heart

You think that its not ur fault for who i am

You don't know what happen along the way

You wouldn't feel abit of the feeling i have all the way back

You never knew how i got home myself

I don't know how i got home.

Smashed till you cant see it

out of love

2007-01-02T02:27:00.000+08:00

on the veri second day of the new year.. its all coming back
you shldnt ask if you had cause me pain again
i couldnt reply
wad's more can i say
lie abt all the oppsities
or nvr make clear to you
i all out of love
dun tease me anymore..

i couldnt stop..

2006-12-17T01:34:00.000+08:00

i dunno what happened..
i dunno why are we becoming apart
i couldn't stop us frm that
i couldn't stop tears frm falling because of you

all i want is to get slow
but i'm moving
i dunno why it hurts more than it takes
why couldn't you take it all away
including my pain

why didn't you do what you always do
take away my pain with your touch
let me feel your warmth once again

yet its too late
the truth is cruel
this is what we came to
after so much

here is where we end.....

its been a week..

2006-12-11T22:56:00.000+08:00

yup its been a week.. everyday i'm thinking abt it but still i dun wan to start any conversation.. nope nt this time since last sat.. thou this coming sat is ur birthday but i guess i aint imprt la.. so a card is all i'll do.. very kind enough le i think.. hmm still i hav yuan qi in me.. but i'm stubborn this time.. i still wont initiate.. i wont.. trust me this time.. i wont.. it's struggling but i'll tell myself its gonna be fine.. its gonna be over.. hmm kind of deceiving but it'll go.. i'm thankful yet i hate u for it.. contradicting huh.. anyway u cldnt see this.. so i'm can speak freely here..

wad is planned for me this week.. late shifts.. late shifts.. late shifts.. haa i'm just plain bored haa shld say i din concentrate on my ptc n i'm here blogging lol.. hmm yesh thurs i'm going for the duck tour n the hot air balloon.. heee.... waiting for it..
haa dun blog le.. i'm on the phone....

let the kite go

2006-11-28T21:58:00.000+08:00

tml is exam on safety, health and nutrition.. hopefully i pass.. haa.. if nt my straight A* will be gone.. haa. yah abit proud tat so far for all my modules i have straight A*s la.. keke.. in sec sch i nvr get straight.. haaa
hmm dun think its chicken ok.. for me its easy cuz i have already 2 yrs of experience in preschool.. hee and i got 90/100 for last presentation.. heheh..
be proud of me k..
hmm things is getting quiet down,, my heart has more settled.. and its time to let the kite go.. be it a misunderstanding in between.. but there's no future in it.. so thurs is coming.. i will let it go.. no more waiting.. no more disappointment.. nt turning back.
let it become the past.. let the past be behind.. let ytd's tears be ytd's.. let today's happiness be tml's too..
i wont deny tat the tot of it now and then will still tighten my heart but i wont let it be the big point of living everyday.
this is onli a not beautiful relationship.. but it ended quietly.. i hope..

a special day.

2006-11-22T23:33:00.000+08:00

after 20 days i have overcomed.. nvr tot it cld be that hard.. couldnt stop thinking everyday.. wad's happening.. todae @ 0705 am.. i finally knew u r safely back..
amzingly i stopped thinking..

childcare sux todae.. since i recovered n return.. tons n tons of things are piling and waiting for me.. PTC is coming and my wrkbks are still left with lots of blanks.. argh.. out of 6 days work for the past few weeks i was nt at sch for 4 days.. nt spending enough time with my students, nt knowing wad the hell the cc was going on, decisions always made without my existance or my acknowledge, n f*** up attitude admins staffs frm mmi, low efficency of mmi, well gradually everyting sux.. n my classroom always look like a rubbish dump.. cuz everytime there bound to be rubbish even when i clear the shelves before i leave...

and i was so pissed..
den i went for my class.. at mmi
scared out of my life.. or i shld say i scared ms saras
all of them tricked me that this module i shldnt miss any lessons at all if nt i got to retake this module again.
and out of their surprised.. i burst into tears.. i dunno why n cldnt control.. n ms saras was so guilty. haiyo but calm dwn after tat le..

hmmm seriously advice to young girls out there. if u ever tot of becoming a preschool educators.. dun try childcare centres.. u'll die..
getting dishearted le.. wish my passion will keep me carry on in this line...

haiz.. wad will come nw...
so saddening..

i'm still strong here..

2006-11-13T23:29:00.000+08:00

its been ten days le.. and i'm thinking everyday but its ok.. i'm gonna be fine.. i wont easily beaten down...

Its continuous

2006-06-22T22:06:00.000+08:00

i knew i had stopped blogging for quite some time haa.. but hopefully i shall be more frequent in blogging..
let me start refreshing.. its been such a long and busy weeks.. almost everyday i'm working 8am to 8pm. in order to finish my stuff for boss.. we have to prepare decorate stuffs for the new opening branch called the Little Uni at NUS alumin club hse.. so damn BO ENG loh.. OMG.. and a few teachers plus our principal are helpin out n decorating the classroom over at the little uni.. so in result teachers over here at our own place are all worn out soon i guess.. its pathetic and tiring.. one hand we teachers back here need to finish the decorating stuffs and the other hands we had to look after 70+ chn.. wad the.. and so stress up.. my mood isnt good at all.. i may blow up any moment in sch if anythin provokes me.. imagine how bad it could be.. for me ti really blow up.. haa.. no one saw or experience or can imagine.. cuz i have nt blow my top yet... so far nt yet..
and imagine shortly 2 weeks only.. while all these decorating stuffs going on.. tot wad worse might happen right.. i am wrong.. first we had an incident in sch.. a kid was poke at the eye.. we sent the kid to the nearby clinic and guess wad the dad was so panic he called the ambulance.. haa.. lucky nt serious but oso i wonder cuz its nt emergency wld the dad been charged for extra cost due to non-emergency.. haa nvm.. on of our staff followed and me n my colleague was panic when we recieved police call.. haa.. where the hell would i knew if i call for ambulance the police would be activated ah.. esp when the call is called by the dad.. why wld the police called the sch.. hahah lol.. this is my first time and last le.. now i noe.. hey guys if u r reading this.. dun laugh at me ok.. u wld react the same thing if u were in my situation.. den somethin went wrong with communication between the teacher n parents.. and things got big then the parent complain to boss.. haa.. lol man.. after some time this matter settled le.. n guess wad this is nt all.. followed complains n complains came shooting in.. argh.. and the worse thing tat happened to me was my dear shane's biting came back again.. he stopped biting for a period of time le.. now.. haiz.. it came back.. and this time ard its the other kids provoke him or snatch his toys den in order to "get back" on them.. he use his "biting skills".. haiz.. helped.. i'm out of ways to cure him.. i noe wad to do but i no longer sure if its gonna help.. i try to make it help if nt.. more complain will come after him.. other parents will come bombarding the child.. imagine he's a 2 yr old child only.. yet he got a humongus strength.. like a com if i must say.. n now.. everythin is gettin dreadful.. i had so much things piled up.. n its like endless.. HELPPPPPPPPPP !!!!
nvr felt so ARGH before.. cannot stand it.. quick wher is my holiday.. i need a break.. break free frm sch... and next sat is the parent-teacher conference.. omg.. i still got tons of things haven finish..
worse 28 july i starts sch.. oh my oh my.. i wonder if i can cope.. sianz..i'm starting to get worried..

my temper is nt so gd recently.. i lost my mood too.. i lost my emotions too.. things are back to sq one too.. worse is i lost my directions.. i dunno wad it is anymore..everyone's busy too.. heard lots n lots of ppl complainin abt this abt tat.. argh.. i'm blowing soon.. dun provoke me.. this is the longest post i ever post for these few mths i think.. probably i shld change this blog to a blog i can venger all my unhappy or anger or stress.. n its mine.. so no one shld had any opinion that i'm against whoever so..

Argh,, i felt abit better..
haa...
still as long as i din get to have a break.. i think i still will be whining here..

it wont change..

2006-06-09T22:22:00.000+08:00

time n time.. it still wont change.. it all coming back again..hmm when will it end? it's going very wrong.. it feels so deep yet its so easily removed.. but i got everything i think of.. i had it all.. thou it come way too late.. but nothin miss out.. i hate it to come late.. but its all 2 words.. "wrong timing"..

Nice song

2006-06-04T19:04:00.000+08:00

it feels like you..

2006-05-18T23:30:00.000+08:00

came upon this mtv.. recent one.. initially tot the song wasn't so impressed.. but since i got nothin better to do.. haha i watch the mtv.. first time a mtv makes me drop into tears.. its about faking to make self feel better..
hmm i noe how its like.. frm trying to accept the fact of breakups, to regrets and frm remorseful to finally realise its over.. in fact anyone who has been felt deeply hurt by a relationship or break ups had to go through this major "operation".. be it who's the one who initiate break up.. both sure felt devastated.. but when you realise wad had gone goes beyond..

whenever the breakups had turned ugly.. met by fate is disastrous..
and i hate it..
if there is a thing that hurts me is that..
you pretend you don't know me, i pretend i don't know you..
you said don't call it a betrayal it is just way of freedom..

girls had higher tendency to forgive n forget.. thou its kind of lying to self.. girls will still wait for the guy to change.. when they waited long enough they accept.. girls are always blinded in love rite.. esp me i guess.. things just happened.. i couldn't help it, couldn't find way out..

but girls really put their mind to stop the torture.. it means they left no energy to carry on..

hmm afterall you will found out that to love or not cannot be forced or fake.. like i finally felt so.. when you don't love, you can live without.. when you can live without, you don't love..

still the mtv reminds me of mine.. still will ache some how but it become a part in me.. the bus.. the seat.. the house.. the room.. the words.. the thoughtfulness.... the hand.. the warmth.. the movies, the shoulder, the laughter, the songs, n my tears..

be it sweet, be it sad.. had been kept inside..

You couldn't expect wad would happen

2006-05-16T22:46:00.000+08:00

You shld started realising how blissful you are now.. n i am.. recently heard of such a sad thing.. yin's fren so pitiful.. dad past away a yr ago n mum just past away few days ago.. omg.. when i heard this i felt devastated.. so having ur loved ones ard you is the most blissful thing le.. pls do cherish...

hmm haven been bloggin.. com is undergoing a virus attack...
HELP....
HELP....
HELP...

OH MAN.. a week ago.. i'm quite busy with things.. happy with things.. having fun n going my collegue's son's wedding dinner.. then went out for the past weekends.. but these few days my mood just flunk dwn.. haiz.. sianz... esp when i heard someone's situation so devastating.. and somemore lots things affecting me.. work wise.. sianz.. dunno when my damn course is starting.. changing n changing the sch.. argh.. shitty sia.. den gonna be damn busy.. bosses adding piles to my work load.. teachers facing big changes.. cuz we all are gonna be subject teaching and changing of classrooms.. ha n my schedule is so tight.. tat onli me dun hav lunch time wif the children.. omg.. they r torturing me for nt giving me food n worse still it starts when i had to go for courses.. haha... mayb they are giving me free slimmin services huh.. keke.. haa.. n my collegues asked me to accompany them join belly dancing.. haa.. hope it really shakes my belly off.. lol..hmmm nw is oready quite busy with stuffs.. but in near future i'm gonna be damn busy le.. n oready now.. my ribs n back is aching n killing me.. shit.. i'm aging fast... argh.....

but i'm happy..
i'm contented...

Being stupid is a woman's nature

2006-05-07T22:41:00.000+08:00

haa dunno why.. tot of this.. stupidity is really woman's nature.. but so many examples..
when woman are blind in love.. they become stupid.
when woman are blindly workaholic.. they become stupid..
when woman are blindly over possesive.. they become stupid..

but man still loves woman when they are stupid.. lol..

haaa.. i'm talking rubbish.. dunno wad i wrote.. lol..

life is absurd..

hmm today..
just had prata at jalan kayu.. finally found the so called original prata shop.. and we waited an hr for the food.. lol.. n got myself milo dinosaur.. ahhahahahaa.. nice.. n now got my butt nicely sitted n blogging..
so busy recently tat i dunno wad i'm busy doing.. hmm recently went find rwds.. last fri went ktv.. hahah.. finally.. my ktv craves had been cured.. but nt satisfied yet.. muahahhaha..
oh yah.. alots of things happen.. in dark or in the bright.. haa.. things has been up to its sleeves.. but i'm gonna catch the tail if i got the chance.. argh... wadever le.. dun provoke me.. if nt i'm gonna be nasty soon.. which is nt nice.. and no one so far seen my nastiness.. so if someone makes me turn nasty.. u r really something,,,

You better watch out where u going..

that damn shoe

2006-04-24T23:11:00.000+08:00

Argh.. i'm still in pain.... that shitty shoe.. ARGH.. cant believed that i safety hm in daddy's car yet.. i slipped the moment i stepped out of the car.. wtf... best of all nt my butt tat hurts.. its my arm tat hit the door when i slipped... ouch.. had slight acupuntured by dad wif the horrible oil.. but even with the lightest force pressed on the bruise.. i screaming in pain... oh no..... sob sob.. pain killer pls....

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.....

In Pain......
In Pain.....
In Pain.....
In Pain......
In Pain.....

its great todae..

2006-04-22T00:19:00.000+08:00

wow todae was damn fun n filling.. due to tml is joyce's bdae n next fri is her last day at work.. we organize a nite out.. wow had a great dinner at Rendezvous Hotel's Straits Cafe by the Park.. its an International Buffet.. n the food.. wow.. shiok.. i love it.. esp the fondue.. delicious.. we all had fun n laughters..playing ard.. n something happened.. omg.. lucky onli Novane saw.. lol.. hmm the oyster wad quite ok.. i had two onli.. but the sashimi i couldn't resist.. splendid.. the desserts cakes n chocolates.. *awww so contented.. keke.. *yawns.. i'm tired.. hope tml got plans.. if nt is another boring weekends.. sad..

is it getting fake..

2006-04-16T18:11:00.000+08:00

this shit is gettin in me..

it puts me off seeing all.. nonsense?
why almost all is putting everything as memories.. things had happened i noe.. but oso it had blinded everyone.. have forgetten why initially we get together.. why has the initial simple bond being polluted.. deep down everyone knew.. no one is being left behind.. no one likes to.. no one will.. isn't it devastating things becoming like tat.. when u learnt everything doesn't comes so easily or go so easily.. u will be able to had a more forgiving.. u may say am i saying u are nt forgiving enough.. no i dont mean tat.. but when u see the moment being together is more imprt than anything else then wad happened in between doesn't matters that much le.. each of u knew it badly tat time hasn't left us much n yet.. things got worsen.. and wad's all the starting of each other's frenship gone to? i noe we often got blinded by things.. but if we get to realise wad's the initial feelings or bond for each other.. it nvr will be late.. yes u cant guarranty tat feelings will be the same but u spent wad is now wif one another.. isn't that more imprt.. dun tell me everything is just a empty shell.. if it is.. we had been faking for yrs mah?

i knew everyone felt it.. but no one shows it.. if its gonna buried deep down there in you.. den everyone got to bear the responsibility.. be it clear.. its EVERYONE cuz everyone plays a part to be together.. den now everyone got to be blamed.. aint we r like bro n sis that is sueing or arguing wif each other for the herit money.. its getting ridiculous isnt it?

and pls dun let it go.. hold on.. it isnt a empty shell..

its wrong, when will be the right

2006-04-14T17:22:00.000+08:00

hmm things had nvr been right... its always the wrong time wrong choice.. really giving up hope on finding.. so shitty... wtf is it so hard to do it right.. todae.. a day of lonesome.. gettin used, it'll be fine..

since 20th July of 2004

2006-04-10T22:29:00.000+08:00

haa.. surprisingly i have been blogging for 2yrs and going.. thou i'm nt veri regular blogger.. haha.. but have been blogging since 2004.. omg.. i totally forgotten how i started blogging hahah.. hmmm but i know why.. at that time is to lock some memories down.. memories tat i wan to keep.. to remind myself.. review back all posts.. hmm life for the past yrs had been amazingly chaotic.. and oso involving wif rwds since.. eh ard 3 yrs ago too.. lots of things happened.. wif rwds n others.. walk all the way till nw.. here i am.. still a nothing.. hahaha,, haiz.. undescribable feelings i hav.. mixture.. song n song tat kept reminding me of wad i face.. argh... shitty man..
i had learnt alot of things along the way.. but onli one thing tat i've learnt i hated it most.. which is nothing last forever.. once someone promised forever.. but... come to the fact.. no one can ever promise forever.. if one do.. he or she is bullshitting.. ARGH....................................

Goodbye.

2006-04-02T23:41:00.000+08:00

对不起
还欠你的我不能给
别把我心也带走
去跟随

每一次和你分开
深深的被你打败
每一次放弃你的温柔
痛苦难以释怀

爱情的滋味此刻我终于最明白
但欠你的我不能给
我才明白爱最真实的滋味
我终于明白

所以Goodbye了..

我的幸福

2006-04-01T22:53:00.000+08:00

我的幸福是什么

是当你牵起我手时
你那转给我的心动

我的幸福是什么

是当你的手轻轻摸着我的脸时
你那转给我的温暖

我的幸福是什么

是当你亲吻我的嘴时
你那转给我的爱意

我的幸福是什么

是我轻轻把头靠在你肩膀
你小心翼翼的保护着我
让我不知不觉地安心睡着

我的幸福是被允许的吗？

我正停格在爱情过敏的季节
过敏源是对你的思念

Chinese Basic

2006-04-01T22:44:00.000+08:00

Recently my 2 yr old kids are learning this chinese verse.. haha.. amazed.. they can actually recite it.. i bet some of us couldnt know wad it is rite.. haha..

hmmm its so damn long since i blog.. gettin no mood n more lazy to blog le.. lots of happenings lots of ups lots of down.. be it wad it is.. life has to live on.. just believe wad u r facing now.. helps u to grow better.. for the time being just hang on man.. haha.. todae had meeting at cck.. its abt communication with the child's parents.. hmm n guess wad we met our new principal.. Novane.. some how in our centre.. we r the first 3 who actually get to noe or see her.. hmm impression.. i can say nt bad la.. but see how as it goes loh..

hmm dunno wad recently i'm busy with also.. so busy n tiring.. haha but got insprations for lyrics again hahah..

it's so fake..

2006-03-14T00:25:00.000+08:00

today is our first time meeting at sk branch.. hmm discuss abt kindness n the upcoming concert.. n blah blah.. so sianz.. i almost felt aslp when things gettin bored n repeated.. lucky got break.. n went for 7-11.. and thanks wynne for the drinks.. n sweets.. so sweet of u...
hmm talking abt kindness for the past one mth le.. to be kind is to be human huh.. lol.. and todae got a conclusion.. everythin seems to be so fake.. damn fake..
hmm dunno why.. things are gettin so bored n lifeless again... seriously i cant wait for my course to start le.. hope things get busy on the way.. till i dun hav such a bored time here... argh... wad ever...

its today..

2006-03-11T00:34:00.000+08:00

hmm tml.. its the day le.. jason gonna spent 2 weeks away.. so fast..
and fhew... we are all 20 this yr le.. most of they guys are ns-ing soon.. back track to sch days.. we are all plain sch nerdys.. n now.. we are exposed in this big big world for 20 yrs.. omg..
times really flies..
like yan mentioned.. yrs ago when we first joined rwds.. memories.. happenings.. tragics.. happiness.. lasty growing-up..
i guessed all of us grew more matured.. no matter wad is it nw..

hmm.. memories..

first day of sec sch.. orientation.. so excited to find out whether anyone i noe is in the same sch or class as me.. and fortuanetly this first one i noe of is may chan.. then slowly get together with those sittin ard me.. tian nee.. wenyan.. geraldine.. jasmine.. eh hmm we r together in the same class for 2 yrs..
den first sec 1 interaction camp.. hell lotsa fun.. we are so attached to our neighbour the E3s.. and since we are the pioneer batch. there's onli 8 classes in the entire sch..

our sch lives are all rather normal i shld say.. everyday after sch if no cca or plans.. this bunch of us always buy the korean instant noodles to my old hse (at tamp) and camp.. lots of happy fun happenings.. hmm think back.. i cld still remb incidents.. Alex cause my wall fan to land on my dining table while we having noodles.. *lmao.. imagine tat shocked pale face of his.. shhh... hmm n i remb kian lim trying to open my aluminium gate.. and guess wad.. he broke the gate's handle.. omg.. i was not knowing to cry or to laugh.. and lastly i remb someone pulled out my window grill.. hahhaha.. lots of memories in tat hse.. i oso remb we watched titanic.. the most popular movie during sch days.. haha censored or uncensored.. lol.. *guessing* i forgotten le.. oh yah tat time we are one big family too.. haha we girls are the shift-cultivation grp.. hahhaha.. hmm somethin like tat i guess..
oh yah.. just rembed somethin.. actually i dunno rwd's existance till tat christmas bbq nite wher we started joining rwds... i was so damn slow.. lol.. when back in sec sch i din noe.. when working with rwd at nippon i din noe.. until tat bbq.. haha.. i was laughed by yan.. but nvm.. i still noe.. haha..

omg cant stand le.. i go slp le.. shall continue again..

but wanted to say..
*Jason take care o.. see u soon.. thanks for the present dude.. like it alot.. plus its perlini's silver.. hahhaa..

i'm fcking sorry

2006-02-23T23:25:00.000+08:00

i'm sorry
sorry i always din noe how to cherish you..
time and time i let go
time and time i din appreciated
time and time i took you for granted

i'm sorry..
really i am...

but tat was a min ago.. when slience was between us.. and now.. i hanged up.. i'm really wtf now.. wad a joke.. you weren't wad i tot u were all along.. we were so diff in mind.. i now realise how come we become buds.. you always tries to put ur piece of mind right into mine.. u blame me being stubborn nt to listen to u.. and u kept judging wad u think is correct.. have you ever stand on my view... do you ever noe talkiing to u is so stressed.. and we always end up quarrelling.. tis such a sad thing to noe tat we r really thru cuz u r really not able to comfort me the way i need.. i always get fud up attitude frm u at the end of our conversation.. wth...
since the day i noe u.. u were very very sensitive..
but wad u just told me.. really makes me realise a saddness thing.. u dun believe in any besties or soul mates or one who regard each other so imprtly tat we sacrifise for one another.. u regard us as foolish fellows.. how cld u... u can dun believe but dun put ur disbelief on me n my frens.. yesh i sound naive to you.. but did you ever noe.. the world's most precious n fragile thing is relationship between humans.. be it love or frenship or kinship... you seems lost all ur faith on these
those r/s were the most wonderful thing on earth.. the onli warming heart thingy.. times and times i'm so touched by the bond between me n human beings.. i noe things cuz u to be so dishearted le.. but its not naive.. its having a heart going on.. believing on things u hold closely to heart is not naive.. to u it may seems like.. but nvr to me.. cuz i will learnt to not scare of discourage by some taken backs.. may it be betrays.. may it be rejection.. may it be in any form.. i will get sad n fear.. but it wont last long.. cuz so many heart-warming things ppl had done to me.. like my working collegues.. thou i'm the youngest there but they all treat me so well.. so closely.. i felt like a lil princess protected and pampered by them.. i'm so bliss to have them... and they are the one who are they for me.. i'm so touched.. and if i'm in bad mood or sad.. they are the first to kana.. really thanks n sorry... but i can say.. i love my collegues i love my students.. they brighten up my day n warmed my heart.. their love make me not to fear n worry le... i'm very xin fu..

We belong together.

2006-02-17T01:11:00.000+08:00

I only think of you
And it's breaking my heart
I'm trying to keep it together
But I'm falling apart
I'm feeling all out of my element
I'm throwing things
Crying
Trying to figure out
Where the hell I went wrong
The pain reflected in this song
Ain't even half of what I'm feeling inside
I need you
Need you back in my life baby
When you left I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby please

Who else am I gonna lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody else

We belong together

Happy Valentiine..

2006-02-14T23:35:00.000+08:00

Happy Valentine...

todae is vday.. had time off to take.. n went off at 4.30.. went to meet yan first.. saw the old sch fotos at her hse.. haha.. memories.. went dwn meet qa ben bert nget n kuku.. pool first n bk.. hahha black came along the way.. haha n classic black.. make boughtwrongly.. he bought a pathetic tenderchicken side snack.. haha.. lol.. hahah but nvm.. i shared my mushroom swiss wif qa.. haha.. black super classic.. haha next time go bk again.. he sure kanna suan.. lol.. after dinnre we went back to park.. jason james n mond came joinin us.. hahah mond came wif present.. muahahaa.. so sweet of them.. thanks alot.. n its my favourite.. a unicorn stuff toy.. omg.. but how they noe.. nvm.. got present can le... so happy.. i got somethin i always wanted.. really really touched.. thanks to each of u.. n thanks to nget n ben acc walk to the block huh.. lastly thanks to jason n mond for aac me all the way to bus stop and wait wif me for my bus.. hehe... so damn touched le.. thanks guys.. had a happy day..
yeah.. chalet coming.. yea....

Last day of Chinese New Year

2006-02-13T00:10:00.000+08:00

ops.. i kept u guys waiting for so long.. for a recent blog waahhaa... well.. where shld i start.. keke..
hmm saw lots of photos right.. its fun during cny.. but soon the heat is gone.. thou heat is gone but we had katong fever.. lol.. went ktv n gaming very often..
thurs i on leave.. went bugis with yan n bao.. we had fun.. took neo prints.. haha.. n the "we love al-bert" sign.. lol.. fel got her result on fri.. they went gaming again.. haha.. sat bao, qa, big bird kor kor, small bird n me.. went marina to slack.. haha.. initaily at carl's jr but end up at food court.. haha.. back to tamp.. went for pool again.. n due to lawrence's lost of bet to bert.. he had to do "washing of plates, moppin cleaning the floor, clearing the cupboard" x4.. haha wad a bet man.. gd one bert.. hahhaa.. as usual went to qinyao hse for soccer time.. n haha.. due to the very next day's match.. i stayed at yan hse.. haha.. i forgotten we joked on somethin or chat abt wad.. hmm to recall its been so long since i last stay.. haha..
mornin woke up so early.. slpt at 4 plus.. haha.. so tired now.. today's match vs ben's cousin "so-called-team" lol... hhhaah took part in wad trial tournament.. haha lol.. we won... 8-0 clean one... some went food court to eat n some at kfc.. n went off first with ben james jason n bert.. walking n craping wif bert abt the lion dance.. haha.. he talks like an expert sia.. wad drum tempo wad dance step.. ahaha.. show me ur lion skills.. hahhaha.. "mao jua.. hu jua.." lol.. n i rush all the way hm.. to go auntie hse.. haha.. reached there ard 2plus.. den went shoppin wif cousins,, at wher... haha.. tm n cs... lol.. went back to her hse... steamboat again.. omg.. its been a steamboat new year,, hahha.. n now i'm home sweet home.. hahaa.. finally cny is over.. hahha.. n big sales... lol.. sob.. pay haven come..
but yeah.. chalet is ard the corner.. whahahaha.. so happy..
yet haiz... my darling is in hongkong.. sob sob.. wed den come back n tues is.. wtf valentine's.. haiz... no date. sob sob.. wher's my valentine.... *sniff sniff*
yet.. i felt much better nowadays.. things cleared.. things planned... but will it be over so soon.. i dunno till i met.. things will be fine...

cny photos part 2...

2006-02-02T23:37:00.000+08:00

The Very Beginning....

this is eng jing.. nope.. suet jing.. hahhah.. see.. she's gettin slpy.. keke..

haa.. this is albert.. dunno who's he smiling too.. lol.. bo bian.. star idol mah.. haha..

eh.. Magician Ben... lol... i'm speechless.. or i shld say.. wordless..

this is bao... wondering who's she staring at.. haa.. dun tell u..

this is sharon.. the cute petite girl.. eh she's admiring tat..

hmmm this is charis.. wondering she is reading or "resting.. haha..

n its onli.. me here.. acting cute.. lol.. omg..

My Favourite foto afterall..... 27 26 28..

hans..... muah lil bdae celeb...

2006-02-02T23:04:00.000+08:00

eh... i hav no idea.. when is this taken.. wad caught my mind... hmmm..

Omg... the Egg Relatives... haha..

actually its a nice foto.. but there's tragedy behind it...

my oh my.. when he's gonna stop.. lol..

Haaha.. newest trend.. yu sheng bdae cake.. haha.. wonder wad's up for next year.. saw fel's face.. she is saying.. "so wad" haha..

photos photos...

2006-02-02T22:41:00.000+08:00

oh my.. i hav no idea.. wad she's doing.. haha..

dun mind the girls... haha hmm so fast our 3rd cny foto..

Its another grpy photo loh..

hahaha.. to end wif the acting... at yan hse.. haha..

Happy Birthday to me...

2006-01-28T12:08:00.000+08:00

muahahaa.. my first post on my 20th year ahhaa.. Happy Birthday to Me.. hehe.. finally i'm 20..
had great fun since yesterday.. the moment i stepped in i got my present.. keke.. my dear boys gave to me.. ehhee.. den lots of ang baos.. oready.. hahhaha.. and i got a big surprise... waiyin they all.. they call themselves DOTz.. haha.. gave me my present at my workplace.. haha.. thanks girls.. n yeah.. the fotos i'll keep it well.. haha..
after work.. went hm first hahaa. den went to meet rwds for dinner le.. hee... took quite some fotos.. haha.. reached there.. that lady claimed me din reserved,... argh... but we still get to eat n hav fun.. thou we r two tables away.. hahaha.. hmm lots of heart to heart affairs.. hmm.. but i certainly hope soon will be fine...
after dinner.. we went to century for movie.. "fearless" .. hahha n tat bao cried at the ending part... haaha... n after the show hehe.. i got my cake.. hehe.. thou its 2 piece but thanks alex... hehe..

yeah i'm 20 le.. happy birthday to me..

A Message

2006-01-24T00:04:00.000+08:00

Dear....

I am a super snooper.
I search and check
everything within my reach
and often beyond.
I am curious,
too curious at times.
I declare my independence,
often quite loudly.
I know i can do it,
all by myself.

But,
Please stay close.

I need you there,
to help keep me from hurting myself
I need you
to encourage me,
and allow me
to try to do it by myself,
and to help when i can't
or when i get frustrated.

i need you
to hug and cuddle with me.
If i do something you don't like,
Tell me.
Show me a better way.
Please don't reject me.
Please be patient.

i've got nothing else to say..
dunno wad's more to say..

if its yrs ahead i see this coming..
i guess i wld nvr want to take it..
but because i accept it yrs ago..
and thru these yrs..
the imprtance becomin so deep..
n yet.. this is how u see..
to me.. all along..
between us is onli us..
nothin else..
n yet.. somethin tat i had to accept yrs ago to go along..
n now it makes me loses u..
you never noe how much imprt u meant to me le..
i knew i can nvr be as imrpt as the one u regard..
but still u r to me..
u can discard..
i couldn't..

yet you still dun see..

Scrotching Sun

2006-01-21T23:44:00.000+08:00

Todae Was the most tiring day... i woke up at 6am.. went out all the way to choa chu kang.. hmpf.. so unfair.. its always cck or jurong west.. when is it gonna b at sengkang.. argh.. such a long journey to such a meeting.. n todae is the sentosa trip.. argh...

but thankfully it ends early.. n so surprise... they r still at harbourfront.. n waited for me... thanks man.. i'm thankful.. hehe.. n we went in together.. n the scrotching sun is shining at me.. oh no... sun block sun block.. hahha.. n suet jing kept putting lots lots n lots of sun block.. when the pic comes.. u'll c.. haha.. we had fun... play friskbie.. play volleyball.. guys play soccer.. n hahha.. we played touch rugby... wow damn tiring loh.. thou i din slp much last nite.. but.. i still played all.. hehe.. spent my every single bar of energy.. n den hungry is the word.. as usual.. we had our tuna mayo n nutella wif bread.. hehe.. seems like our traditional le.. haha n ltr on.. after food.. we are ready for creativity.. u'll c lots of sand castles.. n a huge face we made.. n of cuz.. something we did n took fotos of.. the absentees.. bert n hock.. see noe one of u r sick n the other at tp.. thou we r far out at sentosa.. we still brought back stuffs to c for them.. haha... bert n hock.. wait till u c.. u two will be touched...
we stayed long there todae.. while bathin.. it started pouring.. hahha.. n thanks to mond's umbrella.. i aint wet.. hehe.. n all of us headed back hm... i slpt all the journey hm.. haha.. buay tahan le...

i'm gonna rest very soon...
i enjoyed todae..
thanks everyone..

暧昧让我变得贪心

等待已失去了意义

没有相爱的证据

无奈的我写不出结局

a busy weekend..

2006-01-17T21:08:00.000+08:00

i noe... i long time nvr update.. haha.. as quite a few ask for my update.. so i'm here la..
had a packed weekend.. n now finally mrs kwan is back to sch... n again.. lots of stuff to do loh.. but my bdae is ard the corner loh.. *11 more days.. keke.. but sad to say i haven bought my cny clothes.. sob sob..
sat.. initially sentosa ws planned.. but end up we went orchard wif rwds.. as usual centre of attraction on Da Star Idol.. we went searching for cny clothes.. n again.. i din eye on any ideal clothings.. haiz.. got time to yet not suitable.. now had ideal one yet no time.. haiyoyo.. lol.. some of them bought their clothes.. esp Hock the boss buy tat 139 shoes.. n nget bought tat too.. omg.. lol.. but counted cheap le lah.. for them... haha.. for dinner.. we went carl's n bert met garett.. haa.. so coincidence.. too bad i din saw leon.. keke..
sun.. we went the teo heng ktv haha.. sound uncle rite.. but damn cheap loh.. next time surely go there le.. hahaaha.. after tat went back to tamp. we slack at central park.. n slowly all one by one went hm.

todae.. was onli tues.. but feels like weekend is near oready ahhaa... hmm hoping.. i cld get to find ideal clothes.. this week.. haha... pay day.. come fast.. n a gd news.. i got increment le.. haha but.. sound "not so pathetic" increment le.. haha.. compare to 6dollar increment.. lol..
overall i'm still satisfic living everyday.. n bdae dinner wif rwds if no other suggestion.. shld be at han river le bah.. keke.. i had my 3 wishes in mind loh.. kek.. and all presents are welcomed to pour in.. wahhaahahaa... i'm waiting loh..

waiting to receive my best present for the year..

resting at hm

2006-01-12T14:07:00.000+08:00

haa.. i'm forced to stay at hm.. for the first time.. lol.. argh.. got this bad flu.. its sucky.. someone still say waa so gd got mc.. lol.. but at hm i'll be missing my babies.. missin damien, missin jerron n my kevin, kumar n worryin abt sean.. oh no,, they r overtaking my life haha... n now they stands fully in my mind.. taken up so much space in my brain.. hahah..
hmm restin.. yet felt like rottin.. slp slp n slp.. so sianzz... everyone busy schling.. i'm so bored,,,

8th January

2006-01-08T03:25:00.000+08:00

Happy 20th Birthday 14 yrs old fren.. Mr Lua.. haha.. Beckeong..

and Miss Feltoria is turning 18 soon loh.. hehe..

an opening eye trip..

2006-01-08T00:54:00.000+08:00

todae worked 9 to 2.. had ptc wif jordon's mum n joshua's parents..then had a great shocked at 1.45pm.. one of my student was pushed and knock against a corner of the shelf.. my heart almost dropped out of my mouth.. i was so damn panic.. i even do somethings not rite.. n i'm very sorry.. but lucky chace's forehead had a huge bum n a line.. was so damn afraid the line wld just spilt open n profusely like a past incident.. heng ah.. its a big bum and not a open wound.. and sorry dear russell i shouldn't be so harsh to you.. i'm sorry boy..

after this big shock.. heart still pumping fast.. went to meet mond hock n bert at tm.. haha was said meet 2.45 but haha.. we met at 3.30.. haha lol.. lucky nvr meet 3 at bugis.. cuz we actually reach at 5 lol.. ard 4 bao meet us n off we head for bugis.. initially was i who wanted to buy clothes for cny.. but end up mond n hock bought very nice shirts... sob sob.. almost walk the whole bugis yet i cant see wad i was looking for.. and along the way.. lots of.. "eh is that the star idol Albert" or "hey tat's Albert leh.." or "hey albert look so cute.." n my biggest lol.. one girl came up to at least take 4 or 5 autographs.. first one of cuz for herself bah.. but.. hmmm advise to fans.. its really better if you ask for autographs urself.. hmm no offence.. but it feels happier bah.. i guess lol.. after bugis.. we walked all the way to suntec.. even da ming xing oso walked loh.. whahahaa.. den bert will sure say.. wad da ming xing.. ming xing oso human loh.. kaka.. haa.. after "viewing" the "carrefour" and i saw gordon.. he was tugging his mummy to play the tikam tikam machine.. haha he was so cute.. he looked damn shock upon seeing me wif my frens there.. after much walking again we went to take bus 10 to the simpang bedok.. i now den noe tat the place is wher my honey kids child care used to be.. haha.. went before during days at nippon express.. hmm i think went wif huiyun travis n elson bah.. hmm who else leh.. eh forgotten le... haha reminds me of nippon days.. days which i hardly sees the sun.. so pathetic.. haha.. yet fun i can say..n pay wise.. richer definetly...
ok ate tissue n cheese prata.. veri full.. dunno is too sick of it or too filling.. haha.. n finally we went back to pavilion for pool session.. the usual stuff la.. lots of happening joker stuff makes me laugh non stop.. haha... saw balls flying here n there.. saw how "LAN" they play todae.. haha..den wow.. finish the last game.. its 11plus le.. ha.. so gd of them acc me walk to busstop but they can conviniently take bus frm there lah.. keke.. todae is a damn tired day.. n almost a heart attack day for me.. haiyo... n my feets are damn painful loh.. i'm gonna kill that shoes.. n i had to cut the strap off the other shoe due to one of the side was snapped due to bao.. haha.. but nvm. i cut le.. n now i'm blogging at this timing.. lol.. droppin dead soon.. but just finish chattin wif bao n yan oso.. haha.. lots n lots of stuff.. tml gonna pack my room again.. haiyo busy day.. hehe n finally i'm gonna hav my hair done.. yesh...

hehe my birthday is coming.. 20 more days...

HOCK ANG.. I WANT MY CHOCOLATE MUDPIE.. NOT MUD!!!

dun feel like blogging..

2006-01-02T22:43:00.000+08:00

its a start of a new year.. yet i felt wad a packed begining of 2006.. the whole day i'm busy finishing my workbooks.. n tml's lesson plan.. n i still haven finish... awww... sry guys,, say go find u guys but i end up stuck at hm all day.. haha.. nvm weekends will be here soon.. kaka.. being is this line teaches me nothing but worrying n being paraniod.. lol.. zhi ye bing.. haha..
dunno things is gettin better or worse..
hack care la..
i'm just done wif a great big thing.. n felt so gd now.. yet another comes..
be it gd or bad.. i'm leaving it behind.. u dun bother den why shld i.. getting disappointed oready.. so long le.. got worse den before.. seriously.. u dont see wad's there beside u le.. at times i really want to wake u up.. a great shake on u.. but.. i find it meaningless le.. nothing cld be done.. n here i am angry wld onli hurt myself further.. u wont noe anyway.. so i'm leaving u behind.. too late if u realise now.. n i'll feel worse if u say u knew it yet u cant do much to it.. so if u knew oready.. dun tell me.. keep it to urself.. i wont give u another chance le..
ARGH...
ending it here.. who ever is reading.. just forget abt it.. i'm just flushing it all out..
wad a year man...

ahead 2006..

2005-12-29T22:14:00.000+08:00

soon 2006 is here in a few days time.. time really flies.. and 31 Aug 2004 till now.. i cant believe it.. i've taught for a yr le.. thou pay still quite pathetic n work is piling.. hmm i still love my job.. nvr tot i wld hav my passion for a job for a yr.. tot i was a san fen zhong person.. haha.. yet i wont regret taking this job thou it tough.. i'll work to my plan.. hope yrs down.. reading this post of mine i'm still glad going on.. n i'm still happy in this line...
next yr i'm still taking new badge of toodlers.. but seeing my precious ex students all went to else ppl's hand.. i'm so worried n unbearable.. hopefully they'll survive.. haha..haiz.. but dun care le.. my Chee Teng Fai is withdrawing.. waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...

sob sob.. my Sean... but still will get to c him if i got time.. hhaha..

a new year coming.. a new class ahead. bringing a new mood.. starting a new life.. waiting for a new change.. and having a new smile...

Year 2006 is all i'm waiting for.. dun disappoint me.. *smiles*

Boxing Day

2005-12-26T00:50:00.000+08:00

Happy Birthday to Dear, Dearer, Dearest May Chan
Finally u are 19.. while in 3 weeks time i'll be 20..
sob sob.. one yr older soon le lah....
hmmm christmas atmosphere is not very strong this year..
hope new yr will hav a stronger atmosphere..
hahaah..

yeah tml i'm going out early..
goin to pick the kids out.. hahha
they are damn happy..
slp early loh..

Merry Xmas.. hohoh..

2005-12-25T01:07:00.000+08:00

just got home not long... todae worked in the mornin.. after work met bao.. haha.. we went for kbox.. unexpectedly.. wahhaahaa.. after singing out loud.. we went to meet rest of rwds mond,bert.hock.nget,an,khia seng n charis.. actually went to airport to find them after their magic show.. but lol.. before we go they come back le.. ahha.. guess wad.. after tat zhong se qing you nget buy present for karen instead of us.. we went to pavilion again.. for pool.. haha..
den after tat.. paul came, tet tet kian heng they all came and lastly yan n tong came.. full hse le.. haha.. they went for ah pek's pub while me n bao head hm as usual.. haha.. and guess wad.. got my christmas present from mond n hock loh.. wahahaah.. thanks thanks for the present.. hehe of cuz this yr i had more xmas present.. keke.. cuz i'm a teacher mah.. wahhaaha...

Merry Christmas everyone..

hehe i having fun at bert's website loh.... lol..

so sianz..

2005-12-18T23:28:00.000+08:00

hmm so fast.. one yr is gone soon le.. 2006 is in 2 weeks time le.. hmm n i'm turnin 20 soon le.. haiz.. yet i hav somethings yet to fufil.. how leh.. shld i or shldn't i..

i'm a first aider

2005-12-17T23:41:00.000+08:00

YESH!! i passed.. hehe.. i'm a qualified first aider loh.. hehe any injuries during match.. i bao le.. wahahahaaaa.. bleeding la.. fracture la.. i'm skilled wif bandage le.. keke..
hmm seriously i have tot of the sponsers but some are not possible oready.. but i will persist in finding de.. if anyone got this lobang.. tell me k.. ROWDEES wo men hen qiang.. hahaa.. quote frm nget.. hmm still tired after the chalet.. haha we slpt at the pool side.. omg.. i'm having flu le la..

haiz... so shag.. dunno its trouble or bliss..

christmas tree..

2005-12-14T23:34:00.000+08:00

finally saw 2 christmas trees out my window.. last yr got more.. nw left 2.. haiz... sadded...

The Nite.. steam....boat..

2005-12-11T23:04:00.000+08:00

On top of all.. We'r the BEST... gfs... muacks..

The Best Gay Partner of Rwds.. born on the same day wor... fated.. haha..

Oh we aint gays... we r les... for 10 yrs n going... lol..

Saw that.. its beer.. its hua quan.. so.. sort of gambling huh.. hehe.. familar actions?

Look Mond start Peelin the skin.. oh OUCH!! we girls r helpless but to eat.. haha..

This is how dovey lovey rwds can be.. dun laugh..

She's the promoter for prawn skin lol... look this is how much mond had peel.. poor prawns

We r simply the promoters everywhere u c.. hehe..

Girls... We r like tat...

Another poor girl.. sob sob.. rwds....

Poor... Dogg........ Big Brother's still hungry// lol..

The Nite.. steam....boat..

2005-12-11T22:36:00.000+08:00

Our Rwds Boss.. keke... juz look at his smile.. he's proud man..

wad~ mond turns gay.. OMG!!!

Oh no.. poor Donald.. hungry guys...

hmm u will seen us most of the time.. hahaa..

i'm only an accompany to her reaction.. hahaha..

Oh no.. they dun wish to reveal their faces wif her.. lol...

This is the universal sign of rwds act cute team.. hehe..

todae..

2005-12-09T21:20:00.000+08:00

wonder where to start updating le..
last sat.. working..
last sun.. rwds match.. we won.. steamboat at nite..
tues.. star idol recording..
wed.. cheryl n terrence out..
thurs.. Mr An's 19th Birthday...
tonite.. an empty nite without any christmas tree..

dun feel like going details..

so just be it...

too much to be specifiy...

chalet coming loh..

2005-12-01T22:40:00.000+08:00

yesh.. rwds chalet on 15th to 16th.. but dreadfully i got my first aid exam on the 17th.. sob sob.. die la.. got to study n play at the same time le.. hahaa.. lol..
really hope i pass.. if not jia lat la..

hmm finally.. Albert See in loh... haha i got vote o.. but compare to rest of the rwds i'm small fry onli la... heee...
but poor thing.. nicholas is out.. how come.. initially i tot bryan will be out.. den left nic leo n bert.. i tot leo will be out.. who noes.. sob sob.. but nvm its onli an exposure.. he sure got alot chances ahead.. hahaa..

hmmm todae was ok... i had my 3 new children n me.. sittin on my pathetic semi circle table.. the onli 4 of us.. in the pathetic "studious apartment" classroom.. lol.. hmm quite nt use to onli 3 kids.. cuz i usually takes at least 13 and above no of chn haha... but lucky me i get to relax le.. haha.. still misses my old kids.. thou diff class le.. they promoted frm playgroup to nursery 1.. hope their new teacher treats them well.. n i'm quite worried seeing them nw.. haiz.. *shakes head* if onli i can change my choice.. nvm la.. wad done is done..

bless them... and me.. and my jie meis.. and my xiong dis...

wad is it tat u want..

2005-11-28T00:43:00.000+08:00

hate changes.. hate unstable routine.. i used to hate routines. but nw i dreadfully hate excitement.. couldnt control self.. start all nonsense all over again.. wad is it that you want.. n wad has it become of me.. nothin feels right lately.. kept having so much to bother.. facing so much walls.. hearing echos.. is wad left in my routine.. wad's imprt anymore.. oready feeling sucky yet...... onli echos to ans me...
sick n tired yet cant stop..
wad worsen is this happen on else person.. why is it that both ppl who fall in love once together.. end up hatin each other.. love is so dangerous.. it changes ppl so easily without realising..
but i never regret riskin to danger..
yet timing is my killing pill..

*deadly in depression

*totally pmsing

*Sshoooo

*Cant be bothered

*Promises always vanished

late update..

2005-11-22T20:55:00.000+08:00

hmm sunday..
Rot at hm whole day till 4plus went to da same field to see Rowdees Vs Audaz Garza.. and half way thru the match it started to rain heavily.. n we all grab n run like mad.. hahha.. but against all odds.. WE WON!!!! 5 - 0
hmm Monday
which was yesterday.. work up so early n went sch at 7plus.. we teachers went all the way to Jurong branch for meeting.. can u believe it.. but thru maxi cab n the traffic jammed for abt half an hr.. due to the rain n accident.. n again busybody drivers tat cost the jam... lol.. after the whole meetin we were dyin flat.. went for dinner.. hehhe steamboat leh.. hahaha lol... thanks to them..
hmm Tuesday
which is today.. nt so bad but still tiring.. and i yet to finish completing my newsletter... jia you loh.. n my jie mei.. today ffly le... to macau... sob sob.. gonna miss to bits..

*simply miss everyone..*

回不了

2005-11-19T18:27:00.000+08:00

开始的我们没想过会到这里
现在的我们只是我和你
那时的一起渐渐消失

最近的你让我好陌生
不知是好还是坏
虽然想过会有这么一天
却不知来的太早

我还来不及难过就见你离去
我忍着
告诉自己迟早会离开我
告诉自己你不会忘记这些经过

最后我们至少曾经一起走过
一切回不来也去不了
深埋在我这里

Kindness to myself

2005-11-17T23:49:00.000+08:00

kind...
hmmm still can merely remb this Hao Gong Ming taught in pri sch.. at my time of cuz.. now i suppose they change to some other titles.. haha.. still i dun see kids nowadays any polite or kind.. not that they isn't any but.. strangely its getting lesser.. is the society changing.. hmm humans think abt it.. haha..
kindness to myself.. this topic was throw to me to do my planning for the coming term.. so far i left one more activity to go.. hahah i learnt too.. kindness to self is.. taking care of own body.. keeping clean n hygiene.. but i got to add.. in my own theory of cuz..
being kind to self..
is nt over pressurized urself.
is nt forcing urself.
giving urself a space to take a breathe

being kind to self is nt only pysically but oso mentally
the brain oso need a rest for god sake..
so dun over work self...
brain need off day too.. hahaha..

to be kind is to be human..

human are u n me..
emotional
unpredictable
and lastly
able to feel things wif heart..

so no matter wad obstacles/unhappiness/unbliss
still believe tat heart living in u..
nvr give up on tat..

muacks..

had a fun nite

2005-11-11T00:16:00.000+08:00

hmm sooo tired todae.. n its yellow noodle day again.. i juz can force tat yellow thingy down my throat.. n end up cooking instant noodle.. haha.. hmm abit restless n add on to my tiredness.. those naughty lil felllows.. playing at the sink.. totally drenched.. and some under toilet train.. urined on the floor.. n best of all 4 of them poo poo at the same time.. n i spent all the noon washin thme in the toilet.. hahah nw u think its fun.. keke.. but to me.. its everday's norm le.. wad a day at sch... lol..
hmm last nite reach hm abt 2 le.. so tired.. but its quite fun.. finish wrk at 4 den go tamp meet rwds.. hahha we r centre of attraction loh.. cuz due to bert's fan club color.. we all wear red.. lol.. imagine tat... hmm almost 30 of us took train n seprately alight at novena n toa payoh.. took cab to mediacorp.. there was veri crowded.. n like sauna at the reception.. waited some time.. finally we get to enter... n guess wad.. woah... so mani in red.. wah bert is so famous loh.. but eh.. some how mostly xiao mei meis.. but he's onli 17.. of cuz teens killer la.. hahahha.. maybe ah ma killer soon.. esp wif his tat mimi yan.. haha.. like mine.. keke.. =p
hmm saw leon too.. but of cuz.. he's there to support garette.. eh i think i spell wrongly but nvm.. haha.. hmm whole recording end ard 11 plus.. n us 28 ppl.. some took maxi while th rest took cab.. n i finally had my dinner at tamp mac.. n den walk to central park.. they initally playin soccer but den i guess rainiin bah.. n thanks fel, suet jing n boon.. acc me go wait cab.. hehe.. n the funny cockroach thingy along the way.. haha..

rch hm.. go pom pom.. den Zzzzzzzzzzz

hmm so fast its fri le.. n i'm workin at 10..... hmmm.. got to slp soon.....

Right here waiting

2005-11-04T00:28:00.000+08:00

finally i'm back from genting..
bought with every single ringgit i have.. left 20cents haha..
broke now but happy..
genting trip was fun..

ton in yan's hse sunday nite
early mornin we set for genting
reach ard late noon
went for our first meal.. kenny roger
but the waitress damn attitude.. pretend not to hear or see us when we ask to order..
really fcuk up.... ops shld censor tat...
thou the food there wasnt as nice compared to sg's
but still enjoyable.. being there all we do mostly is eat.. hahaha...
we ate kenny, marybrwn, mac, din sum, ba kut teh, n the stupid cooked food store..
their service seriously overall was ok.. but still rm for improvement.. cuz we encounter lots of attitude services.. which we shldnt.. hahha
went fun to lots of places.. ripley's believe it or not, haunted hse, safari (its a club nt a zoo.. lol..) and of cuz outdoor theme park.. i went to play the free fall tower thingy.. hahha.. damn fun n cool.. n the swing thingy.. heheh n most of all thanks guys acc me to ride on the merry-go-round.. heheh.. i noe veri paiseh but thanks.. keke..
everything was splendid.. reach spore was so tired.. and yea tml finally start work le.. i missed my kids sooooo much...

and so happy i'm back.. thanks to the trip my mind is refreshed wif lots of things n no more doubt.. lastly imu.. a little. a little too much.. a little too often.. a little more everyday.. wont change a bit..

u'll b right here waitin.. so sweet...
when things goes wrong, when sadness fill my heart, when tears flow in my eyes.. like u told me..
u are here..
stil here..
always b here...

-imu-

yesh.. i run

2005-10-20T23:19:00.000+08:00

hahahaa.. todae i accomplish le.. thou not much of running cuz scare food indigest.. so yanli and i walk all ard punggol.. den frm punggol to sengkang.. haha.. reach there le.. we meet esther.. hahaa.. tat pig girl.. keke.. ops.. *its our deal thingy... haha inmagine we walk there n walked back to my hse.. we walk for 2 n half hrs.. *winks* gd rite.. i noe nt enough la.. but frm nw.. every tues n thurs i'll be joggin le.. yea.. jian fei jian fei.. jia you da qi for me k.. *muacks*

muz go rest le.. sob sob tml they all will be dancing in the concert sch left me n lu hui... *booo hooo*
nvm i'll party with my kids tml.. dun care.. hmpf....

haha todae still happy.. after all.. got to go run abit n hehe.. saw bus guy.. keke..

coincidence..

2005-10-19T23:21:00.000+08:00

todae met ma at busstop and we go work together.. hahah.. dunno why recently the bus is always packed.. and.. again i saw bus guy.. hahah.. lol.. ma say nt bad.. hahah... hmm todae manage to 3 chapters of Da Vinci Code.. every day chiong the book loh.. muz faster finish the book.. n my lesson plan as well.. before go genting muz finish hehe.. last nite i still dreamt abt the genting trip.. wad a dreadful one..
todae was quite ok.. but reaching end of work.. things get quite havoc.. cuz some things aint arranged properly by somebody.. but nvm.. over le.. fri at least i noe who stayed behind helpin me..
and finally i found running khakis le.. haha nget i'm runnin le loh.. in punggol loh.. heheh... =p

hmm finally tonite can slp early.. *Yawn*.......

so long..

2005-10-18T21:47:00.000+08:00

todae saw le..

pathetic

2005-10-10T23:51:00.000+08:00

juz a pathetic person..
writing a pathetic blog..
with a pathetic mood..
and with a pathetic wtf..
and seeing a pathetic person everyday..
with that pathetic attitude..
its so pathetic..

*thou cant say straight to your face..
but if you ever step on my tail..
i tell u.. even u r so eldery tat shld respect of..
sarks u.. i tell u.. dun given me that pathetic attitude..
i wont give u face..

wad more to say..

2005-10-10T23:43:00.000+08:00

tell me.. just say,,
u isn't leaving at all..
you wont bare to leave this coldness to me..
just tell me..

the world is gettin so cold..
nothing pushes ahead..
no more..

cant believe.

2005-10-09T21:00:00.000+08:00

haha.. yesterday i really went to Tampines Regional Library.. wif sharon.. haha.. she returning books.. n i juz happen to know that actually books borrowed frm other libraries can be return in diff libraries too.. haha.. lol.. let sharon laugh me out.. haha.. hmm thou reach the children section.. i felt kanna cheated by the glossary but nvm.. i still manage to find some books for my students.. keke.. n found a meaningful book wor.. haha..

see i really got borrow books loh.. keke...

hmmm den bao came find us.. we went 827 for dinner wif nget n hock.. den find james tong an paul ben at 820.. n up we went to meng hse for soccer match.. they sure bet alot.. hiak hiak.. =p hmm at first sharon n i decide to hav our own party at my hse but.. while sharon went hm to prepare to go my hse.. my mum took cab n fetch me.. w/o tellin me earlier.. haiz.. n there goes our party.. or princess party.. lol.. nvm.. next weekends we'll be havocing in yan's hse.. wahahhaa.. hmm todae whole day slack at hm.. hmm flip out lots of memories.. esp my pri sch classfotos n my PAP report card.. hahah amazing...

hahaha.. amazing rite i still kept it well loh.. heheh.. that when i'm in K1.. see i got straight A's lei!!! dun play play ok... heheh.. hmm seen the fotos.. lol.. i laughing at myself la.. haha.. n at some of rwdians.. haha... n guess wad i post those old sch photos on my frenster.. hahaa.. feel free to go c.. hahaha...

k la.. enough le.. gotta do some work.. keke... tata..

My Loves..

2005-10-05T00:09:00.000+08:00

My Charming Prince... Nigel Chua.. kaka..

Amias.. His smile simply makes me unable to scold him fierce.. haha..

Nice match huh.. lol..

Best Buddies o.. hahha...

My Loves..

2005-10-04T23:30:00.000+08:00

Irresistable Smile.. My PG Sean Cheeee

Beloved Bao Bei.. Jared.. Awww.. isn't he cute... dun pinch him.. *keke

My Lovable Rascals.. *LOL

My One n Only.. Playgroup Class.. they simply make my day..

My Leader Head for creating Havoc.. but still he melts my heart,, aww..

by the designer..

2005-10-02T20:30:00.000+08:00

A lonely street lamp

I'm out on the street walking home

A small pale blur

Leaving trails like a snail I move so slow

Time can bruise*violent indigo

Rush home to your arms

You soothe my weary soul

Wrong or right be mine tonight

Harsh world be damned we'll make a stand

Love can bind but mine is blind

Others stray, but I won't walk away

Walk away

The clubs are full

Of couples resisting being one

They wear their youth

Like badges that tarnish all too soon

But we'll be a team

Our two will be one

Love will be our fortress

When all else comes undone

Wrong or right be mine tonight

Harsh world be damned

We'll make a stand

Love can bind but mine is blind

Others stray, but I won't walk away

Walk away

Sometimes the world don't make sense

Small children filled with violence

Let our light

Shine through the night

Wrong or right be mine tonight

Harsh world be damned

We'll make a stand

Love can bind but mine is blind

Others stray, but I won't walk away

Walk away

I won't walk away

[c] e*lame

after so long..

2005-10-02T02:52:00.000+08:00

hmm i so long din blog again.. todae so late le still bloggin here.. haha.. juz back frm tamp.. todae veri packed.. worked till 2.. rush to xu hse.. help wif powerpoint.. den rush to century to watch movie wif bao yan tong mond nget ben james n jason.. we watched Dukes of Hazzards.. wad a hilarious show.. lol.. after tat apn = as per normal.. go meng hse watch soccer.. mond went hm cuz tml he is settin to sea.. hahahaa... bon voyage o.. lol.. we went bb court for soccer again.. n me.. cab hm loh.. wad else.. haha..

to you my dearest sis..
its been 17 yrs without u.. u had nvr forgotten by me.. u always stays in my heart..
thou for a mth.. we live together.. thou i had nt much memories.. i always love you..
my dearest one..

wad past let it go...

Star Idol

2005-09-18T23:58:00.000+08:00

waking up at 10 on a sunday.. am i too early.. haha.. meeting nget mond hock ben calvin and of cuz the Star Idol to be Mr Albert See hahaa.. we acc this bert to his star idol 2nd audition.. acutally meetin bao at novena den as usual she say meet us at mediacorp.. but hahah.. end up din see her at all.. keke.. funny girl.. but she got somethin on.. tat's why..
first time.. we realise bert really got talent acting hahha.. he even got backing.. Lu Jiang.. haha... bert becareful he ask for ur num o.. hahaha..
hahah n i even saw steven lim.. hahaa.. damn exagratting loh.. hmm after his audition which like took almost whole day.. n the zhang yao dong's twin which is ben.. so kuku.. insist goin jurong to get the "camera" free gift.. tot it wld be at least a digital.. haha fat hope.. a very manual.. hahah..
ben next time dun be too gulible ah.. haha.. todae whole journey is taken by cab..
hahaha.. todae is a very gd exposure or experience for bert bah.. haha.. n an eye opening for me n us i guess..

hehe.. so tired.. go slp loh.. hehe

Until Here

2005-09-17T15:56:00.000+08:00

Until Here i walked our journey
as we cant go forward to do things we cant
More than a friend yet less than a lover
up ahead i see skies turning grey

Cry. should I?
so much of you and me is taking up my mind
i simply just cant surrender
cuz u makes me wonder
standing in front of me
which one is you
the real true self

Unclear stand of ours feels so torturing
simply cant find evidence of true love
making me dunno when to continue
when to give all up
even the courage to comfort i couldnt find

Unclear stand makes ppl turns greedy
but till every meaning lose itself
then helpless you and me
seeing no future ahead

give up this beautiful sin
let it end here.
cuz its all we can do.

祝福从来就不属于恶魔直到你为我画出幸福的形状...

exhausted.. so cakey..

2005-09-16T23:24:00.000+08:00

such a cakey day.. had a great yet tiring day at sch todae.. we celebrating mooncake festival in the morning.. all the teachers including me.. acted a drama of the Chang Er n Hou Yi 's story.. veri hilarious.. haha.. all children had great laughter n so did i.. hehe.. n we get to play "guess wad flavour u r eating" hahha kinda lame to me.. but my kids love it.. esp the part when they onli noe how to eat.. ahaha.. and in the noon.. we celebrating one of the K2 student Shannon's birthday.. my baobei's sister.. can u believe it.. her parents ordered 4.5kg cake wor.. veri big.. as she wans to celebrate wif the whole sch.. 87 ppl lei... wah.. and everyone enjoys it.. esp my babies grp.. they simply turned into messy dirty.. xiao hua mao le.. hahhaa..
hmm todae after celebrating i left early at 5.. feel so worried n guilty leh.. my beloved partner is falling damn sick n yet i left sch early.. but cuz tonite had a met up wif yan bao nget lex bert an n ben for gathering of yan's bdae... so i hav to go.. so sorry yinyin.. u take gd care k..
met up wif them.. n we had carl's jr for dinner.. quite ex.. but the portion is so big.. den lucky i got nget to help me up wif partially burger... hahaa.. after eating.. we took funny fotos.. hilarious ones.. haha.. esp bao n the mr slurpee n mr big gulp.. ahaha..
n so this n that.. this n that.. nw i reached hm.. n here i am blogging..
tml is the open hse le.. sure veri busy.. hahah.. but nvm.. i worked 9 to 2 onli.. haha.. wad plan for tml.. seriously i dunno.. but the most rot at hm loh.. its nt tat i din did tat b4 whahahhaa... go to slp loh.. nitez everyone...

Happy 19th Birthday Girl..... Winnie Yeow.. Muack Muack..

fluing

2005-09-14T22:36:00.000+08:00

oh no.. i'm having bad flu.. non-stop flowing.. haha.. like running tap.. ahah.. and at the same time i still cant rest.. wad is this,, haha,, wad to do.. still hav to do marking of my students' wrkbk.. poor teacher.. so nvr tot ur teacher had gd life all along.. they deserved high salary k... cuz govt is pushing them to their wits end.. demanding for new ideas to perk youths' creativity.. wad is this.. anit teachers human.. hai.. some parents think Teachers are GOD.. omg.. i think teachers are multi tasks octopus... if govt employing more teachers.. maybe they can build more mental recovery instution for bonkers teachers huh..

hmm feel so tired nowadays.. dunno when the genting trip comes.. haha.. hmm but tml me going swimming wif bao.. kekek.. den finally fri got celebrate My dEAR JIE MEI's 19th Birthday.. Dinner at where still deciding.. keke.. but sure hav a great one yea.. and next fri will be Bao's bdae le.. muahahha... i'm totally broke.. whenever it comes to sept.. hahaha...

i muz jia you jia you.. quicklly finish my lesson plan b4 the iso comes.. ganbatte...

so fast i worked 1 yr and 8 days.. so pround of myself.. u too yea.. hehe... *muack*

happy birthday guys..

2005-09-12T23:06:00.000+08:00

Heyz Happy Birthday Mond n LooPo.. heheh..

enjoy guys.. hehe...

old days..

2005-09-11T22:06:00.000+08:00

hahah.. juz gone thru lots lots of fotos.. geez... i sure had a great laugh.. but some how.. really missed those days together,,,
all started from this..

then our sentosa freak days comes by..

the girly rowdians

oh nooo.. the sulky face.. hehe,, jk..

Xia Tian de Feng

haha our sentosa days nvr end..

wad is she trying to do.. *ponders* haha

opps look alike long lost brothers.. heh,,

and of cause the classic..

and den the chalet days..

1 2 3 4 Hi5.. Yea..

is the New SuperMan coming?

*Jesper* the precious one.

and we are.. still as one..

everyday ahead ish precious and therefore we cherish every seconds together..

Rowdees Cheers..

hateful

2005-09-10T01:07:00.000+08:00

hate u being blissful
hate u being more blissful than me
hate u make me feel so evil
hate u make me so selfish

你凭什么比我幸福...
我一定会比你更幸福..

wad's ahead?

2005-09-08T00:56:00.000+08:00

hmm just finish some of my lesson plan n colourings.. watching abit of Qiang Wei Zhi Lian. hmm so blissful.. hope one day.. living like them wif my husband.. hahha.. i think too much dun even noe whether i'll get married anot.. wahaa.. hmm i miss being blissful.. or i shld say.. when will i feel blissful.. cuz i haven felt b4..
seen and unseen..
felt so not blissful now.. at this moment..
where's my dada..
.....
so tired of complicated things..

simply unforgetable
simply irresistable
simply unparted...

haiz..

can you wash it away?

only you can..

单恋

2005-09-06T01:17:00.000+08:00

人类的感情最特别的就是单恋
那是绝无堇有的
你绝对不会看到一只猫
偷偷地喜欢上另外一只猫

单恋象极了含苞的花蕾
里面隐藏着无限的可能
有时后甚至比一朵盛开的花
更动人更引人遐想

单恋要好好珍惜
不然一不小心它就不见了

当这个恋情真的不见的时候
那就没意思了

i'm back

2005-09-04T14:47:00.000+08:00

i am back..

i'm getting better.. after that terrible sore throat call tongsilities.. so terrible.. nvr noe sore throat can make my gum swollen haha.. but nw better le.. dun worry k..
hmm i learnt alot from the trip.. thru the workshop.. thou the trainer izzit gd.. but the content is gd.. i really learnt to maintain positive attitude.. which is called.. "renewal attitude" no one always have positive attitude towards everythin or anything so one must always make urself happy.. even ur frens ard u so gloomy.. influence them.. let ur positive attitude help them over come sadness n fear..

that's why no matter wad.. no matter how sad u are deep inside.. dun let it spoil ur day.. if you think you can, you can.. if you think you cant den you are right..

so i think i can.. and of course i can..

i always will smile even i'm tearing inside..

off to msia soon

2005-08-30T23:35:00.000+08:00

hmm blog this before going to malaysia o.. hehe...
i'll be going this Sebana Cove on Thursday but dun worry i'll be back by fri i guess.. the most sat will be back keke... dun miss me too much kies.. but i noe for sure u all gonna miss me.. muahahha..
alright dun vomit la.. hehe.. but dunno would i be bored there.. cuz whole day will be having workshops here n there... sianz.. morale low when i get to noe whole day having workshops.. hai.. but nvm.. i'll get to see fireflies at nite.. hoohoooho...
hahah m once last thing.. juz nw last min back all the stuff cuz tml nite i'll be staying in the childcare as thursday early morning 6am hav to take off frm centre to tanah merah loh.. hahah taking ferry there.. hope dun get sea sick loh.. hahah i remb bao seasick tat time in msia.. whahaa...
hmm tml will be having pyjamas party as celebration in sch for teacher's day.. wahhha... unique rite.. hahaa.. that's sk Agape teachers' style.. hehe.. plus me u noe sure its gonna be crazy.. i'll be crazy in my pyjamas.. waahhaaaa..

hmm somehow i gotta discover 2 boxes of letters i used to receive during pri sch days.. juz saw the contents n i lol.... so funny.. n some even tok abt my 13plus yr fren Mr Keong.. haha.. hey bud.. got time i show u some huh.. heheh..

k la.. got to go slp le.. my throat is killing me.. n medicine is working drowsness on me...

take care frens.. i'm gonna miss u all.. i'll be back real soon k.. keke.. MUACKS..

the unusual story

2005-08-29T00:00:00.000+08:00

once there is this little girl
who always been such an angel
slowly as she grew
she sees the ugly reality

she started building walls ard her
she get no more hurt
and only the beautiful sky
until one day rain came pouring in

and the walls starting rumbling down
she sees an glowing light
coming nearer n nearer
she fears more when its so much brighter

she hid into the dark
deep down so dark
and where is she
inside her heart

searching her soul now....

she saw the rain come falling
washing clean
she sees an angel
she never sees anything so clear

the angel touches her
the face was so familar
she sees so often
that she din realise

she tot faith n trust has left her long ago
until now she saw the angel
he came right beside her
gave a pat on her head

a gentle touch that she never felt before
she crack to tears
she felt saved
saved from darkness

been thru so long
she found
was found
saved

she is still waiting
for him to say
let's go back to the beginning
when you first born
when you first cried
then you will never cry alone
but in my arms
always
"you are safe with me"

heard upon this
i cried...

onli this not that..

2005-08-28T22:25:00.000+08:00

yup decided its only this..
and its the norm i choosen..
no more unusual nor excitment.
norm is wad i choose

i had heard about this..

ever felt that liking someone deep down
is the best thing you knew
did you know admiring someone from far
is the nicest distance
and still liking you
is the most precious feeling

its something deep down that wouldnt change

did you felt the same way..

would you give someone like this a chance..

i would..

dreaming

2005-08-28T13:44:00.000+08:00

dreaming of you now
all was like a dream

everytime my hair was wet
you will dry them with your hands
i love it when you do that
i love it when your hands mingle my hair

everytime when tears upon my cheeks
your hand will touch my tears
i love it when you do that
i love it when you always know to dry them

...

and who is this hugging me so tight?

i realise..

2005-08-21T23:37:00.000+08:00

i came to realise some things..
i'm happy wif wad i hav nw.. my family rwds collegues n frens.. and amazing after so long all my 19 yrs.. i nw realise.. the best thing i asked for has been always ard me.. no matter wad i met.. happiness or sadness i hav someone to share wif...
my buddy i had.. known him for 4 or 5 yrs.. always being there for me.. knowing the best of me.. in the past i used to hav confused feelings for him.. n nw i noe.. he's imprt to me yet tat not liking someone its a special person whom u can find to share.. perhas tat wad call soulmates i guess.. i'm lucky to realise tat.. and thanks... i'm blessed
my sisters... be it seeing them once a week or longer than that.. its becoming normal.. we used to be hanging out almost every single day.. but we nw came across that each of us has our own path to live.. but still glad tat our frenship din end there due to the less time we spent together... i'm blessed for that..
rwds.. thou i get lesser n lesser time wif u guys.. but its makes me warm when i see u guys,, be it how long i never see u guys but yet i dun feel like a stranger wif u guys.. n tat's simply a treasure.. i'm veri blessed..
and bus guy.. thou had a someone but seeing on bus is still a pleasure to work... hehe.. blessed oso..
lastly.. i realise.. someone out there.. i'm surprised.. after so long.. tot everything is back to normal.. but nw its unbelievable.. i nw couldnt look straight into ur eye.. couldnt breathe well sittin just beside u... couldnt speak normally.. heart juz beat faster.. waiting juz makes my heart fonder,,, n the more concern shows the more it touches me.. gentleness kills me nw.. am i blessed for this too???

i'm totally blessed..

2005-08-19T23:08:00.000+08:00

oh no... school's virus is attacking me.. after this one whole week of cleaning up their diarreoas n vomit.. i'm *bingo dio this stupid virus.. so painful... diarroea n vomittin.. so sianz nw.. juz going to slp i guess..

totally wiped out todae..
*deadly nw..

ahead..

2005-08-18T23:23:00.000+08:00

hmm gonna rush this.. cuz i wan to see superstar finale.. hehe.. but i got alot to say..
nvm.. firstly.. wad's wrong wif the world.. or izzit we create our own trouble.. hai..
but dun care la.. todae happy can le...
forget the trouble part la..
hmm yeah.. 1st of Sept.. YEA,,,,,,,, i'm goin to malaysia.. going to sebana cove.. yea..... so so happy... boss treat sia... wahhahahha.. so gdy gdy.. teacher's day retreat.. yippee....

i going oversea loh...

thanks..

2005-08-16T23:44:00.000+08:00

thanks sharon..

hmm yup bah.. like my blog..

i love myself..

sorry to myself..

i shldnt hate u...

hmmm tons n tons of things ahead..

came to know tons n tons of things..

realise all wad so called life nw

hai.. dun wanna talk abt anything nw..

so messy...

no matter wad.. i'll carry on..

2005-08-14T21:00:00.000+08:00

i hate u
i hate u
i hate u
i hate u
i hate u

and the u is me..
no one els but me..

hate the bitchy u
hate the sluty u
hate the irritating u
hate the selfish u
hate everything of u

and the u is me
no one else but me..

wad there to hate abt..
ME....

now you knoe..

2005-08-13T00:21:00.000+08:00

feelin damn damn bad.. dunno why.. so sianz.. stupid allies.. self-centred ppl.. wad wrong wif u guys.. hello.. cant u help me abit.. argh.. forget it.. u wont noe..

it doesn't matter anymore

2005-08-11T22:19:00.000+08:00

alot of things slowly seem doesn't matter much to me le.. juz even a glimpse of happy will be gd enough already.. wad's there more to be everlasting.. nothin last anyway.. so i'm happy todae..
and fine thank you..

*who cares abt the allies.. dun give a damn..

hehe anyway tml photo-taking wif my class.. keke.. dunno wanna buy the foto anot.. keke..
haha and for once i'm on the cover page of the calender..

i'm so happy todae..

2005-08-08T01:06:00.000+08:00

heheh.. so happy today.. but dunno why nw my nose is bleedin.. still haven stop.. dunno wad happen.. stuck a tissue in it le.. hope it stop.. maybe nt enough slp.. i still hav to cont to mark my books.. hmm tidae.. had lunch at neptune wad quite ok la.. thou look exp n food not bad but i waited till wan to faint le den the food came.. hehe but den later went to far east wif yinyin, doris n anna.. hahaa.. guess wad i bought a green halter top... whahahaa... yan i bought a bright green halter.. u'll scream at me.. cuz its 17 onli.. but u soon can buy tat pepper plus one le.. weri nice on u leh.. keke.. i'm goin black on wed o... hehhe... hmm catch the Charlie n The Choc Factory.. i tell u its a veri amazing show.. it surely tempt u to eat more choc i tell u... bao lets go watch.. i dun mind watching again.. kek.. den hahah after movie.. guess wad.. went to bugis eat tian tian steamboat.. hahaha... we were so damn full... hahaha.. yeah i finishin markin soon.. but onli able to finish the maths wrkbk.. tml den cont. english one.. keke.. got to go slp le.. tml its party time in sch.. yea... hahah... holiday on tues.. its Singapore's Birthday... Happy 40th Birthday o.. keke... hmm today so paiseh., all expense on boss.. haha... i will work hard de... keke...

nite everyone...
muacks..
i'm so happy...

naturally forms..

2005-08-03T21:54:00.000+08:00

hmm din get to block over the weekends.. n nw i'm here loh..
helloooooo !!!
heheh.. had a great nite wif rwds at ChinaBlack on sat...
hahah had great laughs on tong's stunts.. yea??? hehe.. hai having great pain nw.. its killing me.. dunno wad wrong stuff went to my stomach... *ouch*
learn frm my students.. *blink blink* Tr Peggie my stomach pain pain.. wan to put oil.. wahahha.. ha me crazy le lah.. hmm this whole week not taking bus to work.. haiz.. miss the bus g..... wahahhaa.. hai onli if i had all money in the world.. onli if i'm a wealthy ger.. den no guys wld impress me.. haha.. yea.. wonderin wad ur love can bring.. nah... haha.. nvm..
hmm heard this frm a fren.. " anyone can fall in love with anyone.. love is mysterious and torturing at times but still you are willing to undergo the torment....so heartbreaking and sad at times but the hope of having a happy ending makes you feel its worth the risk of having ur heart broken and hurt.....humans are like tat....too emotional...unable to handle such stuff logically.... "
and i think.. if can be logical.. it wont be love anymore huh.. cuz love is magical.. a splendid chemistry between ppl huh..
so love is simple in heart.. yet complicated in actions huh?
but for me.. love still is simple..
love someone means love wholeheartly..
and i always do that.. yet when being hurt.. i'll be totally hurt...
frens told me not to be so guilable or silly..
am i>????
guess so...
no pain no gain???

even its pain everywhere.. u cant probably get ur gain..
cuz love got no guarranty..

wad a late nite..

2005-07-30T14:59:00.000+08:00

oh o.... reach hm midnite last nite.. keke..
had real fun..
after work.. all my collegues gather in sch.. n in fact.. we are dressed..
wahahaha..
went to eat at lau pa sat... wow.. sumptous dinner..
well.. treat by mrs kwan.. hehe..
den we went for show at this neptune restaurant..
watching a *gulp* half naked cannibal show.. wahahhaa..
lol.. somemore its m18 wor..
rwds if bring u guys there.. i bet eyes poppin loh..
hehehhe....
k loh.. gotta bath loh...
be back the veri next early morning.. whaha..

lalala.. i'm so happy todae..

2005-07-29T00:49:00.000+08:00

oh no.. i couldn't help but to smile to my ear todae..
wahahahhaa...
todae.. i meetin annie for dinner..
and we end up joining yin yin to this Settlers Cafe which is a games plus food cafe.. hey guys next time i will bring u guys go k.. cuz its so fun... at clarke quay...
and guess wad.. wahahhaha..
i saw Daphne Sly n Taufiq.. wahahha.. they r there for the shooting stars i guess.. haha n saw taufiq's bro.. look exactly like him.. like photocopy one.. and best of all.. i got sly n me's pic in my hp..
muahahahhahahah... *shy*
*beaming*
actually this all is additonal to my happiness todae...
ps...
tell ya a secret o..
i took a pic of my bus guy.. wahaha..
after 3 days of waiting
he finally aboard the bus.. wahhaaahhahaha.
ops... i'm too over happy le..
hehe.. slpin le..
cuz tml going neptune le....
wahahhahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
cannot stop smiling n laughin

oh no.. i'm going crazy..

all i got to say..

2005-07-26T22:13:00.000+08:00

recently i really find god playin joke on me..
times and times...
things repeating themselves..
why..
i tot once hurt is always enough..
yet why hurting me time and time again..

to you..
why its the always wrong timing...
when will it be right..
this time is really a mistake..
i took for granted
i'm sorry..
but you gave me the warmest shelter..
thanks..
u r the first one forever..
unreplaced..
never forget wad u did for me..
but i wont wan to miss them..

to you..
no words shall describe us..
but nw i totally understand why u choose
just hope u really workin hard..

to you..
ger.. pls dun fan so much le..
cuz there bound to be alot alot ups n downs..
its nature...

to you..
let it go..
remb once u said..
when you love someone..
you got to learnt to let them go...

lastly to me..
i hope you which is me
to be more independent
to be more cheerful
to be more lively
to be not lookin more at the negative side le
muz jia you jia you...
life is tough but so are you..

hate

2005-07-23T21:25:00.000+08:00

simply hate everything everyone everywhere...
nw every lil thing, every lil people will pissed me...
shoooo... great like wad u doing nw,,
dun understand me.. fine... i dun give a damn anymore..
actually going out but last min i drop out..
i alone at hm... waiting someone to get home..
tot mummy's workin i do all the chores..
waited n waited,,
tot can go out for a treat...
n who noes the bloddy hell..
i waited wif empty stomach n this great big joke is wad i got..

and yah.. nw i finally noe..
money cant buy things u wan...
everytime its me who's so broke tat cant go anywher
den nw's wad...
i've got money n no one to go anywher with..
wad a joke..
irony...

pissed...
leave me all alone..
better off....
dont give a damn will be gd enough..
thanks huh..
wad a wonderful day...
s*** here....

i dun wan this..

2005-07-22T23:54:00.000+08:00

pls dun..
i hate this weird feeling..
i noe u r not fine..
dun kept saying u r..
u felt guilty nw but dun let it drag u pls..
and dun do this to me..
i left wif nothin...

at least let me hav the memories..
not pain..

For You My Friend

2005-07-16T23:56:00.000+08:00

A Message
To My Special Friend
Your Friendship means so much to me
We Laugh Cried Share Our Deepest Secret
And Putting the World to Right
I treasure time we spent together
Thanks for your Encouragement
Inspirations Comfort and Praise over the years
Deep down in me
You stand rooted to my heart.
Without friends like every you.
Isn't complete.
Everything is part and parcel of life.
You Aint any passerby.
You are the influence in my life.

Throu out you stand by.
I sincere apologise for any miss i gave
so thousands and thousands of sorry
cant make one of my sincere appreciation of u..
As the aloner in family.
no one to play
no one to talk
no one to whisper

So friend u noe u are that important to me.
All is left a word

Thanks.

You shld noe who u are
rite guys..